Yesterday was elementary and high school orientation. Each kid had their MOM moment, a one on one time to show off their skills and personality, to wow Mom with their growth, intelligence and witticisms- to impress teachers and principals, to re-establish friendships that had waned over the summer, and to make comments on and about EVERYTHING.
From the way the school halls smelled to the lame seating, to the class room roster to the weight Mr. X gained and the color of Mrs. P’s hair.
I swear, I don’t know where they get it.

By the end of the day I felt like I’d just revisited my childhood- on a really bad day- say the winter of 1977- when I got dumped for the first time.

I’m trying to instill the idea of the strength of a positive mental attitude in my children, yet sometimes the only PMA thing I feel is that I am positively going to kill them.
One wants THIS for the lunches, one wants THAT for footwear, one NEEDS THIS and the other can’t stand THAT. One is too short. one is too fat. One is never going to figure it out and other has SO got it all figured out. One wants to be President and the other wants to go to boarding school in England. Who the hell are these kids?

There is no immediate solution. I figure another 6 years at least of child-inflicted trauma, of wine neccessity…so, my short term fix is to keep running away. (brilliant,yes?)
So, I’m going here and here this weekend, immersing myself in a world I understand with people that get me, seeking an adventure, a funny story, an opportunity…
It’s me taking my last breath before 180 days of SCHOOL- before I get back into the 4:30AM routine. Before I have to start shaking one kid awake at 5 am for the 6:05 bus and shooing the other one out at 8.
And on Monday, I might actually get dressed in time for The Back To School Mom’s Morning in across the neighborhood with enough friends and liquored-up coffee to motivate me to come home and sit in my quiet quiet house and write to my heart’s content.